Every other weekend my wonderful hubby has 4 days off in a row and every other weekend we have such high hopes and plans and schemes as to how we are to spend the weekend together. It never goes according to plan and it usually ends up disasterous or frighteningly boring.
Thursday night:
Me: OMG hubby-man.... you're weekend off is coming up. Is there anything fun and exciting you'd like to do on your weekend off?
LP: Oh you know, just family stuff. Can we have turkey dinner this weekend while we are all together and sit at the dinner table like a Norman Rockwell picture?
Me: That sounds like such a good idea. We should have a family game night!!
Friday Afternoon:
(Actual Text Message)
Me: 6 hours and you're home freeeeeeeeeeee!!!
LP: Yup
Me: Do you want to have a bonfire tonight to celebrate your 4 day freedom?
LP: maybe
Friday night as hubby is walking through the door:
Me: (frazzled) Oh my gosh... I forgot to put dinner in the oven!! It's just been so busy and I just got home and settled from work and getting the Monster fed, bathed and in bed. I am so sorry. Do you want to just have sandwiches for dinner and then I will make real dinner tomorrow night?
LP: Sure, that's fine.
10pm: We are both passed out.
Saturday Morning:
Me: We should make cinnamon rolls for breakfast and eat together. Want to?
LP: Sure, that's fine.
Me: Monster, do you want yummy cinnamon rolls for breakfast and eat with momma and daddy?
Monster: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 'SCUSTING!!! YUCK! Eat with MR BEAR! Mr Bear, are you?! ARE YOU?! Momma, is he?
Me: So glad we made breakfast plans......
Saturday Afternoon:
Insert random imporant thing we NEED to do at this point in time.
Saturday Evening:
Me: I'm so tired I can't think straight to make dinner. Will you make dinner?
(12 seconds later)
LP: (on phone) Hey, yeah. I'd like an order of bread sticks and a large pizza? Yeah, take out. 15 minutes? Okay sounds good.
9:45pm: Passed out in cheese coma
Sunday Morning:
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Sunday Afternoon:
Me: We really need to start getting up earlier and going to church on Sundays. It's important for our child's development.
LP: uh-huh zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Me: Let's go play games with our child unit and have family game time.
LP: Sure, sounds good.
(36 seconds later)
Monster: NOOOOOOO MOMMA!! I DO IT! I DO HIT PEOPLE!! I DO HIT PEOPLE!! TELL ME NO! I chopped it UP!
Me: Doodle bug, I'd hate to ruin family fun time because you can't behave and have to go sit in the naughty corner.
Monster: (muttering) idohitpeople..... (sigh)
Me: Oh look, I think I see Elmo's match right there.
Monster: (destroys game with wild hands all over the game pieces)
Me: getinthecorneryounglady!
Sunday Evening:
Me: Leftovers?
LP: Sure, sounds good.
7pm: We are both passed out
Every.Single.TIME!
Ahhh, domestic life. :)
-Suzs
Thursday night:
Me: OMG hubby-man.... you're weekend off is coming up. Is there anything fun and exciting you'd like to do on your weekend off?
LP: Oh you know, just family stuff. Can we have turkey dinner this weekend while we are all together and sit at the dinner table like a Norman Rockwell picture?
Me: That sounds like such a good idea. We should have a family game night!!
Friday Afternoon:
(Actual Text Message)
Me: 6 hours and you're home freeeeeeeeeeee!!!
LP: Yup
Me: Do you want to have a bonfire tonight to celebrate your 4 day freedom?
LP: maybe
Friday night as hubby is walking through the door:
Me: (frazzled) Oh my gosh... I forgot to put dinner in the oven!! It's just been so busy and I just got home and settled from work and getting the Monster fed, bathed and in bed. I am so sorry. Do you want to just have sandwiches for dinner and then I will make real dinner tomorrow night?
LP: Sure, that's fine.
10pm: We are both passed out.
Saturday Morning:
Me: We should make cinnamon rolls for breakfast and eat together. Want to?
LP: Sure, that's fine.
(24 seconds later)
Monster: CHEERIOS CHEERIOS CHEERIOS, MEME WHEEES, MEME WHEES!!! JUMP IN BED JUMP IN BED!!! Me: Monster, do you want yummy cinnamon rolls for breakfast and eat with momma and daddy?
Monster: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 'SCUSTING!!! YUCK! Eat with MR BEAR! Mr Bear, are you?! ARE YOU?! Momma, is he?
Me: So glad we made breakfast plans......
Saturday Afternoon:
Insert random imporant thing we NEED to do at this point in time.
Saturday Evening:
Me: I'm so tired I can't think straight to make dinner. Will you make dinner?
(12 seconds later)
LP: (on phone) Hey, yeah. I'd like an order of bread sticks and a large pizza? Yeah, take out. 15 minutes? Okay sounds good.
9:45pm: Passed out in cheese coma
Sunday Morning:
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Sunday Afternoon:
Me: We really need to start getting up earlier and going to church on Sundays. It's important for our child's development.
LP: uh-huh zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Me: Let's go play games with our child unit and have family game time.
LP: Sure, sounds good.
(36 seconds later)
Monster: NOOOOOOO MOMMA!! I DO IT! I DO HIT PEOPLE!! I DO HIT PEOPLE!! TELL ME NO! I chopped it UP!
Me: Doodle bug, I'd hate to ruin family fun time because you can't behave and have to go sit in the naughty corner.
Monster: (muttering) idohitpeople..... (sigh)
Me: Oh look, I think I see Elmo's match right there.
Monster: (destroys game with wild hands all over the game pieces)
Me: getinthecorneryounglady!
Sunday Evening:
Me: Leftovers?
LP: Sure, sounds good.
7pm: We are both passed out
Every.Single.TIME!
Ahhh, domestic life. :)
-Suzs
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